What the Disney Movie Taught me to help me be a better therapist and Parent

So, I’ve been a therapist for over 10 years, mostly working with children, teens, families, and parents. I always thought I was pretty good with kids, until I had my own kid, and then my understanding and ability to connect with other kids really began to shine.

I became more versed in all things kid friendly, like I know about most shows kids are in to. Including making sure I watch all the new Disney movies the week they come out!

Turning Red had def been one of my favorites over the past year. It was very easy to watch, great MUSIC!! (took me back to my childhood memories ohhhh Justin Timberlake), and also taught me some very important lessons.

I have learned to incorporate “Turning Red” into my therapy sessions with my elementary school (and even high school) clients.

I found that Turning Red has been great at helping me normalize having “BIG FEELINGS” and gave me great ideas for what kids can do when they experience their own! As a therapist, that has always been a challenge, getting the client/child to actually remember those beautiful skills we practice during our session.

So what I’ve found is that most kids have seen “Turning Red”. And then come my curious questions:

curious Question #1:

What would happen when Meilin (main character) when she would have BIG FEELINGS?- and most kids get this one right… ANSWER: “she turns into a BIG PANDA”

My next question sometime requires a little more digging, or re-watching a certain scene. And then my next question is….

curious Question #2:

What were the things that made Meilin have BIG FEELINGS? Then I would identify those things as “triggers” or “things that set me off” and then I explore their own triggers to BIG FEELINGS.

curious Question #3:

What helps Meilin when she is having BIG FEELINGS, so that she doesn’t turn into a panda?

SHE… gets a big hug from her friends, her friends sing to her, and she uses positive self talk and visualization of something that makes her feel good and calm (her friends!)

AND VOILAAAAA!!! We learned some great and helpful coping skills!

Oh wait, this post was supposed to be about how it helped me… well let me tell you that even though I am a therapist, I still get angry, frustrated, and can lose it occasionally. haha But everyday I am challenged to DO BETTER. So here comes my learned parenting strategy…

Parenting Strategy

So what “Turning Red” has given me is the language I can use to share how I am feeling (anger), and then I communicate that to my child, and role model healthy management of my anger (deep breathe)! And I say, “OH NO MOMMA IS GOING TO TURN INTO A PANDA!”, then my son laughs, then I laugh, and all is calm once again.

So all in all, I’ve gained so much from that cute little movie. And lets just hope Disney gives us more masterpieces just like that!